Sin Sod in Thailand - Buying a Thai Wife or just Fueling the Economy

Let me start by saying, that the only man that likes Sin Sod is the father of the bride.  Regardless of
whether you are Thai or a foreigner, no man likes to think that he has to buy a wife.  Sin Sod is a constant source of debate on Pantip.com, the well respected Thai webboard, with many Thai men complaining about the amount parents want for Sin Sod or even, why they have to pay Sin Sod at all.

My Top 3 Tips

1. You can’t avoid paying.

Don’t think that you won’t have to pay.

Even if your blushing bride has been married 3 times before, you will still be asked for Sin Sod.  The past is the past and the family will still be looking to enjoy a secure future.

Rightly or wrongly, society, not just Thai society, generally expects that the man will take care of his wife and family financially.

In Thai, “family” includes parents and can also be extended to relatives in financial hardship.

The greatest expectation for support of the parents falls to the Thai daughter.  Although many Thai men do support their parents, society doesn’t view them as harshly if they don’t.

Thai’s also believe, that a man’s ability to pay Sin Sod confirms his ability to take care of his wife and any children that they may have.

But it’s not only part of the culture, it’s part of the economy.

My mother-in-law is 68 and her monthly pension is a mere 600 baht.  This only increases to 700 baht when she turns 70.  Can you imagine actually living on under US$20 a month?

The economy is geared to adult children taking care of their parents.  The majority of the population escapes paying income tax, anyone that sells food on the street or in a market for example, doesn’t pay tax.  Imagine a scenario where there are 10 people working in administrative or customer service roles within an office and only the Supervisor pays tax.  Everyone else falling under the tax free threshold of 26,000 baht per month.  This is true in Thai.

The government simply doesn’t have the available funds for pensions.

At the end of the day, don’t think about it like you are buying a wife.  Think of it as you are contributing to the lives of a nurturing and supportive family.

2.  There is no set amount that you must pay for Sin Sod.

The amount of Sin Sod you pay is solely dependent on 2 things, the expectations of the girl’s parents and your ability to pay.

At a minimum, you can expect to pay 100,000 baht cash and 20,000 baht in gold.  It can however, rise steeply from there when parents start talking about cars and houses.

The problem is that in many cases, as soon as the parents here the word farang, they will automatically double what they previously thought they would get for Sin Sod.

Always remember, everything is negotiable.

Traditionally for a Thai marriage, both sets of parents would meet to discuss what was an appropriate amount of Sin Sod.

Obviously, the grooms parents don’t want to pay too much, but they also don’t want to be embarrassed by offering too little.

It’s not uncommon for 2 mothers to be heard crowing about how much Sin Sod they received when their daughters married.  Parents don’t like to think that their daughter’s marriage is worth less Sin Sod than someone else’s.  Especially if they marry a foreigner.

To help your new in-laws not to lose face, one option is to give them a heap of cash and gold, just for the wedding party and photos.  Oh, you will also be required to cover all the wedding costs.  Then after the wedding, they only keep an agreed amount and the rest is returned to you.

Although they wouldn’t admit to it, many Thai’s apply this scenario.

If the parents are good people and the girl loves you truly, they won’t leave you penniless.

3.  Follow your Gut

The most important piece of advice that I can give you is to make sure that you feel comfortable with everything that is happening.

People get married for many different reasons and your reasons are solely your own.

But when you start talking about marrying someone form a different country, who will potentially still live in a different country.  It can get complicated.

Foreigners can’t own land in Thai, so the house that you buy for your married life will never be yours.  Something to think about.

Thai girls don’t just marry for money and to be taken care of.

Of course there are some girls like that; there are girls with that mentality in every country and across every culture.

The motives of some foreign men are not always pure either.

Always be honest.

There are many things that Thai’s won’t openly discuss and this can be made even harder if you both don’t speak each other’s language well.

Thai’s believe that if a truth is hurtful to someone’s feelings, they won’t share that truth.

If you’re in love with a Thai girl and you’re continually honest with each other, be confident in knowing that regardless of how much Sin Sod you pay at the start of the marriage, this amount will be returned to you tenfold in terms of a lifetime of devotion.

I have been married to an amazing Thai girl for a couple of years now and I have never been happier.

Word on the street is that the government will be passing a law which will earn them 5% revenue on all Sin Sod 10,000,000 baht and above.  I guess that you can use this fact in your negotiations if God forbid, your Sin Sod ever reached that height.

I hope that you have found this information useful.

Please put any questions that you might have in the comments section below.  I will do my best to answer as quickly and as accurately as possible.

We look forward to seeing you back here again very soon.

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Take care

Brad & Ta